03
Aug
12

Road creep… or….dash

Yesterday, while waiting to catch a taxi to the office, I realised what the behaviour of the motorcycles and moped and scooters at our busy intersections reminds me of!

Let me try to paint you a picture….

Let’s say you have a dog, or maybe two. When you have an area in the house, e.g. living room where they are not allowed, it’s as if there is an invisible line drawn between the go/no-go area where the dog is/isn’t allowed. Let’s say that the aforementioned dog wants to come into the no-go area – after all, in the dog’s way of thinking – if everyone else is allowed there, why should I be excluded? And yet, they actually know all about the invisible line because they have been chastised before – often! – for crossing it.

So the animal follows one of two approaches: firstly there is the SLINK (a.k.a. the CREEP) approach. The dog starts off by standing or sitting just outside the invisible line. The facial expression is usually one of boredom and arrogance I SO don’t want to cross this line, so I am CHOOSING to stay on this side. No one is going to accuse ME of bad behaviour.

Then the next stage involves lying down with a paw – only one – tentatively stretched towards the borderline. Even hawk-eye at Wimbledon Centre Court would have a hard time refereeing this line-call. The accompanying expression is always one of feigned innocence and total blamelessness.

The next effort probably involves turning its head away – if I can’t see you, you can’t see me. If I’m not looking at you, you won’t notice me. Everything happens with excruciating stealth and slowness – there’s a strategy here – slow movement will not draw attention and you will forget about me, you’ll hardly know I am here!

Then comes the shuffle, or wriggle, or squirm that moves a further paw, and a head and eventually – if ignored long enough – the rest of the body g—-r—-a—-d—-u—-a—–l—–l—-y into the no-go area. If success is achieved, all movement ceases, but invariable the delinquent animal is so proud of its achievement and after all, it was actually trying to join in the party, that it cannot help but give itself away in its delight at managing to get so far….and is summarily booted out, temporarily defeated, but not surrendering. It will flop down on the “right” side of the invisible line and humph and sigh at the inequality and unfairness of life.

The second possible approach is far more brazen. With total confidence and declaring no prior knowledge of EVER having been told that the area is off limits, the dog casually strolls in and lies down, feigning sleep and possession of this piece of real estate immediately. This method relies on the strategy that if I pretend it is not an issue no one will know that it is an issue – after all, it is perfectly natural for me to want to be here and now I AM here!

– Personally, I think that the over-confident strategy is far more likely to be effective, but you may disagree!

Anyway, what’s the point of my story?

The two-wheeled vehicles at an intersection tend to follow one of these two approaches when waiting for the traffic lights to change in their favour. Some of the cyclists SLINK/CREEP/EDGE out away from the safety of their side of the intersection – and are often “more than two paws” into the centre of the road by the time the lights go green, sometimes to the extent that they are already blocking the traffic flow BEFORE the lights have changed and the motorists have to weave around them to proceed.

Others are far more bold and don’t even slow down as they sense a gap in the crossing traffic and belt through to the other side without as much as a bat or blink of the eyelid! No hesitation, total ownership, speedy achievement of goals = immediate success!

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